Barmitzvah Boy
Global winner of the 2021 Christmas Quiz 👊🤩🤩
This is our second of 8 games in December in what will be a very challenging month. 15 points would be a decent haul, 18 points is my personal stretch target and if we manage to achieve this (we are capable but it will need application, team spirit and a wee dose of Lady Luck) we will be on course to a top 2 automatic promotion. However as we are all fully aware this is Rovers we are talking about and we are also capable of null points.
I have said in previous Brentford away reviews that it was always my favourite ground to visit barring the cost of ale in that now expensive part of Londinium. I wonder what will happen to the 4 pubs that graced each of the corners of the old ground? Give it 5 years and I suspect at least 3 will have become housing, even a basic terraced house in that part of London now retails at around £800,000
To welcome their move to the old ground Brentford have a new sponsor - Brentford Nylons. The company have recently been modelling their new range on the catwalk at Harrods; I expect these to be top sellers, all the girls in Soho are investing in this slinky sexy material.
I rather like the girl in the Rovers blue, Steve Waggott is also so impressed that he has personally ordered one for Madame Venky Rao hoping she will authorise these being sold in the Rovers store along with bri-nylon underwear. Thank goodness for the leadership we have in the Rovers Boardroom
Brentford are pushing the range hard and have brought lifelong Brentford fan Tony Blackburn from his deathbed to promote the sponsorship partnership.
I have tried out bri-nylon but with only limited success. I am used to the time honoured Lancashire technique of drying my smalls in the microwave; I love having toasty warm socks on my tootsies and underpants gently warming my privates. I tried my wife’s bri-nylon bra in the microwave and finished up with burn marks on my chest and melted plastic on my nipples. READER WARNING: do not heat up bri-nylon underwear in the microwave and attempt to wear it....you must allow it to cool down to room temperature.
During my extensive research on Brentford I was somewhat disturbed by the unhealthy fascination on bottoms (the human kind) in the locality.
Firstly I came across what soon came to be an aptly named street for the area.
Then it all started to fit into place. Brentford is the World headquarters for research into, and sale of, bottom enhancing cream. Apparently they even have parties when you can slap it on the bottom of your wife / girlfriend (and boyfriend) / neighbour / Labour councillor. We need something like that in Blackburn to get us back on the map of fame and fortune. These are the two main products produced in Upper Butts Street and applied relentlessly in the back rooms of many an office after 5pm:
and.....
I have a discount code if anyone is interested; it was 20% off following my 5th purchase of the super effective version. So you can see how effective this is the first photo was taken after only 30 minutes off continuous rubbing (it took two days until she could leave due to being unable to fit though my bedroom door); the second one is my wife who is normally a size 8. It has cost me a fortune in new underwear for her.
On the basis of equality the girls were happy to oblige me with a quick rubdown and kindly agreed to take a follow up photograph of my enlargement. What do you think, impressive or what?
Our Kate, although most impressed with my torso was somewhat reluctant to participate in a bottom cream rub. After some persuasion I carried her off for some treatment. The results will be revealed pre match on Saturday morning just before Mowbray’s press conference.
Kate is more interested in the serious stuff so 2 exhausting hours later she has revealed her prediction that Rovers will win by the fine margin of 1-2. If you are wondering about Christmas and sexy undies she far prefers Spandex support garments to this modern bri-nylon malarkey....so do I
Let us hope after the game it is a case of a toast of “Bottoms Up!” with a glass of ‘Bene n Bot’.
Cheers my dears, BB
* PS. The Brazilian is suitable for vegetarians.
I have said in previous Brentford away reviews that it was always my favourite ground to visit barring the cost of ale in that now expensive part of Londinium. I wonder what will happen to the 4 pubs that graced each of the corners of the old ground? Give it 5 years and I suspect at least 3 will have become housing, even a basic terraced house in that part of London now retails at around £800,000
To welcome their move to the old ground Brentford have a new sponsor - Brentford Nylons. The company have recently been modelling their new range on the catwalk at Harrods; I expect these to be top sellers, all the girls in Soho are investing in this slinky sexy material.
I rather like the girl in the Rovers blue, Steve Waggott is also so impressed that he has personally ordered one for Madame Venky Rao hoping she will authorise these being sold in the Rovers store along with bri-nylon underwear. Thank goodness for the leadership we have in the Rovers Boardroom
Brentford are pushing the range hard and have brought lifelong Brentford fan Tony Blackburn from his deathbed to promote the sponsorship partnership.
I have tried out bri-nylon but with only limited success. I am used to the time honoured Lancashire technique of drying my smalls in the microwave; I love having toasty warm socks on my tootsies and underpants gently warming my privates. I tried my wife’s bri-nylon bra in the microwave and finished up with burn marks on my chest and melted plastic on my nipples. READER WARNING: do not heat up bri-nylon underwear in the microwave and attempt to wear it....you must allow it to cool down to room temperature.
During my extensive research on Brentford I was somewhat disturbed by the unhealthy fascination on bottoms (the human kind) in the locality.
Firstly I came across what soon came to be an aptly named street for the area.
Then it all started to fit into place. Brentford is the World headquarters for research into, and sale of, bottom enhancing cream. Apparently they even have parties when you can slap it on the bottom of your wife / girlfriend (and boyfriend) / neighbour / Labour councillor. We need something like that in Blackburn to get us back on the map of fame and fortune. These are the two main products produced in Upper Butts Street and applied relentlessly in the back rooms of many an office after 5pm:
and.....
I have a discount code if anyone is interested; it was 20% off following my 5th purchase of the super effective version. So you can see how effective this is the first photo was taken after only 30 minutes off continuous rubbing (it took two days until she could leave due to being unable to fit though my bedroom door); the second one is my wife who is normally a size 8. It has cost me a fortune in new underwear for her.
On the basis of equality the girls were happy to oblige me with a quick rubdown and kindly agreed to take a follow up photograph of my enlargement. What do you think, impressive or what?
Our Kate, although most impressed with my torso was somewhat reluctant to participate in a bottom cream rub. After some persuasion I carried her off for some treatment. The results will be revealed pre match on Saturday morning just before Mowbray’s press conference.
Kate is more interested in the serious stuff so 2 exhausting hours later she has revealed her prediction that Rovers will win by the fine margin of 1-2. If you are wondering about Christmas and sexy undies she far prefers Spandex support garments to this modern bri-nylon malarkey....so do I
Let us hope after the game it is a case of a toast of “Bottoms Up!” with a glass of ‘Bene n Bot’.
Cheers my dears, BB
* PS. The Brazilian is suitable for vegetarians.
I don’t do fluffy stuff. 
