Barmitzvah Boy
Global winner of the 2021 Christmas Quiz 👊🤩🤩
Ah the last game of the season. Thank goodness is the collective sigh of the roversfans.com MB members; we no longer have to put up with BB’s demented mutterings. It could have been worse…..we could have made the playoffs and a further deranged preview would have been foisted upon you poor sorry souls.
I have decided on a change of format. For this preview I am going to start with a ditty style forecast. Try it - creative writing (
) is far more enjoyable than watching Rovers.
Here goes thanks to the famous / fab-u-lous Boyzone:
“I can feel it in my water
I can feel it in my wee
The famous Blackburn Rovers
are going to win by three”
Yes, it is going to be a goal festival and Rovers will piss it with a 5-2 win.
This season I am not going to the quaint hamlet of St Andrew’s-by-the-Midden. I have been in those fair parts on a number of occasions and the yokels are somewhat backward. I have heard that many of them vote Labour and the area has the largest percentage of Compo Corbyn supporters per head of population than any other asylum in the UK. I also found out following extensive research that the Birmingham TTWA has more bed wetting oiks than the rest of the UK combined. By my logic this means that most lefty Corbynites are bedwetters
COMPO ‘BEDWETTER’ CORBYN
If you traverse the shady lanes and babbling brooks of St Andrew’s you will come across some stimulating sights. Behind the Olde World Kebab Emporium the locals have erected a commemorative statue to honour their hero Jezza ‘Tena’ Corbyn. Locally it is known as the ‘Wee Willie Wonker’; indeed the locals often stroke their kebab grease hands on his phallus and say “Stick it up the opposition on Saturday son”.
‘WEE WILLIE WONKER’ - A STATUE TO COMMEMORATE THE MOST FAMOUS LABOUR DICK OF ALL:
The Rovers fans making the trip to St Andrew’s will no doubt upset the locals with their witty flags and banners.
WWW.ROVERSFANS.COM ARE ALREADY PREPARED FOR BIRMINGHAM AWAY:
For those travelling to the magnificent St Andrew’s stadium you are in for a shock. The ground has seen better days and in recent weeks two of the stands have been closed due to steel fabrication rotting away and weakening the structure. It will cost 10’s of £millions to rectify. Incidentally I did hear from someone who was in the Darwen End at Ewood last Saturday that the rebar on the steps leading up from the concourse to the seats had rusted through and the concrete is crumbling away; whilst we have dealt with cosmetic cleaning of much of Ewood Park I suspect we have far greater maintenance issues requiring attention.
ST ANDREW’S STADIUM IS ROTTING AWAY
CONCRETE DEGRADATION IN THE EWOOD HOME DRESSING ROOM LAST WEEK
Rovers are expected to field a side with many changes this week. That makes sense given the tosh we have had to endure from a number of our wannabe away players in recent weeks. TM is going to try a new tactic this weekend and I am told he introduced this in training on Monday. He wants us to piss on the opposition. My mole in Brockhall managed to sneak out a drawing which Tony and his gang circulated to the 1st team squad. He wants Gallagher to urinate in the Birmingham penalty area and then focus on that area to receive the ball in the hope that the opposition will keep their distance; what TM failed to take into account is that we have no one capable of providing the killer pass and that Gallagher would miss and then piss on the corner flag by mistake.
ROVERS NEW TACTIC - GALLY TO URINATE ON THE PENALTY SPOT
Rovers hopefully will go out with a bang. I would also like to see TM given a good send off with a fine rendition of Tony Mowbray’s Blue n White Army echoing around the empty stands. Our Belinda is also looking forward to the game. She is not going to the game and instead has asked me to go round and have a look at her dodgy box, if I have a spare 5 minutes I may also fit in watching some of Rovers as well. She has decided to dress up for the occasion with a new beehive hair do and has promised to wear the new undies I bought her to celebrate International Women's Day.
BELINDA SPORTS A NEW HAIR DO FOR ROVERS FINAL GAME OF 21/22:
It should be a full bloodied affair this Saturday. Hopefully the football will be half as good
See you soon for 2022/23
BB 🫥
I have decided on a change of format. For this preview I am going to start with a ditty style forecast. Try it - creative writing (
) is far more enjoyable than watching Rovers.Here goes thanks to the famous / fab-u-lous Boyzone:
“I can feel it in my water
I can feel it in my wee
The famous Blackburn Rovers
are going to win by three”
Yes, it is going to be a goal festival and Rovers will piss it with a 5-2 win.
This season I am not going to the quaint hamlet of St Andrew’s-by-the-Midden. I have been in those fair parts on a number of occasions and the yokels are somewhat backward. I have heard that many of them vote Labour and the area has the largest percentage of Compo Corbyn supporters per head of population than any other asylum in the UK. I also found out following extensive research that the Birmingham TTWA has more bed wetting oiks than the rest of the UK combined. By my logic this means that most lefty Corbynites are bedwetters
COMPO ‘BEDWETTER’ CORBYN
If you traverse the shady lanes and babbling brooks of St Andrew’s you will come across some stimulating sights. Behind the Olde World Kebab Emporium the locals have erected a commemorative statue to honour their hero Jezza ‘Tena’ Corbyn. Locally it is known as the ‘Wee Willie Wonker’; indeed the locals often stroke their kebab grease hands on his phallus and say “Stick it up the opposition on Saturday son”.
‘WEE WILLIE WONKER’ - A STATUE TO COMMEMORATE THE MOST FAMOUS LABOUR DICK OF ALL:
The Rovers fans making the trip to St Andrew’s will no doubt upset the locals with their witty flags and banners.
WWW.ROVERSFANS.COM ARE ALREADY PREPARED FOR BIRMINGHAM AWAY:
For those travelling to the magnificent St Andrew’s stadium you are in for a shock. The ground has seen better days and in recent weeks two of the stands have been closed due to steel fabrication rotting away and weakening the structure. It will cost 10’s of £millions to rectify. Incidentally I did hear from someone who was in the Darwen End at Ewood last Saturday that the rebar on the steps leading up from the concourse to the seats had rusted through and the concrete is crumbling away; whilst we have dealt with cosmetic cleaning of much of Ewood Park I suspect we have far greater maintenance issues requiring attention.
ST ANDREW’S STADIUM IS ROTTING AWAY
CONCRETE DEGRADATION IN THE EWOOD HOME DRESSING ROOM LAST WEEK
Rovers are expected to field a side with many changes this week. That makes sense given the tosh we have had to endure from a number of our wannabe away players in recent weeks. TM is going to try a new tactic this weekend and I am told he introduced this in training on Monday. He wants us to piss on the opposition. My mole in Brockhall managed to sneak out a drawing which Tony and his gang circulated to the 1st team squad. He wants Gallagher to urinate in the Birmingham penalty area and then focus on that area to receive the ball in the hope that the opposition will keep their distance; what TM failed to take into account is that we have no one capable of providing the killer pass and that Gallagher would miss and then piss on the corner flag by mistake.
ROVERS NEW TACTIC - GALLY TO URINATE ON THE PENALTY SPOT
Rovers hopefully will go out with a bang. I would also like to see TM given a good send off with a fine rendition of Tony Mowbray’s Blue n White Army echoing around the empty stands. Our Belinda is also looking forward to the game. She is not going to the game and instead has asked me to go round and have a look at her dodgy box, if I have a spare 5 minutes I may also fit in watching some of Rovers as well. She has decided to dress up for the occasion with a new beehive hair do and has promised to wear the new undies I bought her to celebrate International Women's Day.
BELINDA SPORTS A NEW HAIR DO FOR ROVERS FINAL GAME OF 21/22:
It should be a full bloodied affair this Saturday. Hopefully the football will be half as good
See you soon for 2022/23
BB 🫥
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