A
-
NEXT GAME: Sheffield Wednesday FC
Sunday April 21st 2024
Kick off 12.30 pm
Ewood Park
Championship
A
ABBEY
Guest
A
ABBEY
Guest
A
ABBEY
Guest
A
ABBEY
Guest
A
ABBEY
Guest
A
ABBEY
Guest
are you proud amo lad haha
A
ABBEY
Guest
not like your banning one haha
Majiball
Senior Member
A young village couple on the night of their arranged wedding were sat at home finishing up after a hectic day. The man turned to the woman and said it was time to consummate their marriage. The young girl having never even kissed a man said she needed to 'freshen-up' and quickly went to the bathroom. She called her mother 'Mummy, mummy, he says he wants to have sex, but I am scared, I am just a young village virgin and the thought of a sausage scares me, what shall I do Mummy, Help me'. The mother thought for minute and said she should play with his sausage. 'But how do I do that mummy, I am just a young village virgin and know nothing about carnal activities?'. The mother thought again and asked if the girl remembered how Mummy used to put ketchup on her plate?
'Yes replied the young girl, I do Mummy, will he like that?' Oh yes said Mummy do that and all will be fine. 'Thank you Mummy I love you so much, XXXX'. The girl returned to the bedroom and her Husband was sat in his chair, naked and waiting. I want you play with my sausage he said and winked. The young girl full of confidence started as instructed and the man smiled. Faster faster he said and so she did as she smiled away. That's great my lovely wife, so good, use both hands
'Yes replied the young girl, I do Mummy, will he like that?' Oh yes said Mummy do that and all will be fine. 'Thank you Mummy I love you so much, XXXX'. The girl returned to the bedroom and her Husband was sat in his chair, naked and waiting. I want you play with my sausage he said and winked. The young girl full of confidence started as instructed and the man smiled. Faster faster he said and so she did as she smiled away. That's great my lovely wife, so good, use both hands
Adopted_Sandgroper
New Member
A
ABBEY
Guest
Mike E
Member
B
Because a 'suckjob' just sounds a bit nasty?
There are lots of explanations but the likeliest and probably most mundane is that 'blow' is derived from 'below'.
A
ABBEY
Guest
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"