Barmitzvah Boy
Global winner of the 2021 Christmas Quiz 👊🤩🤩
My my my, writing this preview is taking a lot of motivation. Usually I just sit down, steam up the iPad and the creative juices flow like a rapidly melting ice cream on Bognor Regis sea front. Today I feel like a Common Gull has snapped my uneaten ice cream out of my hand before dropping a massive blueberry coloured bird sh!t on my head.
I lack motivation, and why should I be motivated after watching that garbage week in and week out. The Blue n White’s have amassed (
) 7 points out of the last 42; that is 1 win in 14. At any other time in the last 40+ years that would have resulted in the Rovers Manager being shown the door, why not do we ask this time around? It would suggest that Mr Waggott would be under pressure for the failure of his own appointment.
I cannot really put my finger on why the results, and the standard of our play has plummeted. Like many ‘accidents’ they are often a culmination of events that lead to catastrophic failure. I will list a few that have in my opinion contributed:
- poor signings in some areas (Dumb & Dumber)
- a dreadful injury record
- our pitch, albeit it is the same for both teams and we are also failures when playing away
- the quality of prostitutes in Blackburn and the environs
- wage disparities (Gallagher bring the highest paid) creating discord in the dressing room
- the lack of a leader on the pitch
- too much sugar in the tea
- too many players wanting out.
At the end of the day much of the above is down to management and leadership. I either want Mowbray out, or alternatively I want the Mowbray of old back again, sadly though he appears to have lost his passion.
MOWBRAY OF OLD
MOWBRAY PHOTOGRAPHED DURING THE WYCOMBE GAME
But what of our opposition on Saturday? Cardiff away has become a must win game as we plummet down the Championship faster than a Darwen girl drops her knickers (I can assure you from vast experience that is usually done with electrifying pace). Our fan base is so dissatisfied that instead of the 3,000+ subscribing to iFollow away games earlier this season we will be lucky to get 600, more much needed cash lost to our Club.
Cardiff are typical dollopers and they have a few hypocritical supporters following them as well, the sort of middle class of the Lady Nugee white van hating mode who remind me why the Labour Party are so out of touch.
1st up - NEIL ‘WELSH WINDBAGIO’ KINNOCK
Oh, the cheek of the man
2nd up: LORD KEN ‘LOADSAMONEY’ FOLLETT
Good friend of Tony and Cherie Blair and multi-millionaire author
Cardiff do have a former porn magnet in David Sullivan as fan. Sullivan was born in Penarth, he was a Cardiff fan before making his money selling vibrators in the local pubs and clubs - this projected him to better things like blue movies and a move to ‘Big City’ Birmingham. He could do with employing a personal shopper rather than picking up cast off clothes from from garage and car boot sales. In the picture below he is trying to do an impression of Lenin, perhaps he should have asked Jezza for some advice.
DAVID ‘DIRTY MACK’ SULLIVAN
JEREMY ‘RED’ CORBYN
Our very own ‘Blue’ Kate was so looking forward to this game. She would normally use this game for an opportunity to go for the ride of her life on the ‘Big One’ at Barry Island fun fair. Instead of going for a £5 session in the ‘Love Tunnel’ she instead chose to invite Rovers own hairy mammoth, Ben B, to her morning show. Unfortunately BB was so engrossed by the sight of Kate that he tried to encroach on her space in full view of the film cameras. Whilst Ben has been banned from tv he has landed a contract with David Sullivan for his new movie ‘Hairy Mammoth Lusty Wet Love’. It even pays better than Rovers....a new career beckons for BB me thinks.
KATE EXCITED AND LOOKING FORWARD TO THE BIG ONE
BEN B APPEARS AS TV GUEST OF OUR KATE
As for the game I had to do a lot of careful calming down of our superfan ‘Blue’ Kate. I thought she would be all of a tizz but no she wants me to get Ben B’s mobile number; she apparently likes hairy men. In between the big breaths she suggests a 3-0 win to Cardiff although she did suggest that Ben B will score very soon. Lucky bugger.
I lack motivation, and why should I be motivated after watching that garbage week in and week out. The Blue n White’s have amassed (
) 7 points out of the last 42; that is 1 win in 14. At any other time in the last 40+ years that would have resulted in the Rovers Manager being shown the door, why not do we ask this time around? It would suggest that Mr Waggott would be under pressure for the failure of his own appointment.I cannot really put my finger on why the results, and the standard of our play has plummeted. Like many ‘accidents’ they are often a culmination of events that lead to catastrophic failure. I will list a few that have in my opinion contributed:
- poor signings in some areas (Dumb & Dumber)
- a dreadful injury record
- our pitch, albeit it is the same for both teams and we are also failures when playing away
- the quality of prostitutes in Blackburn and the environs
- wage disparities (Gallagher bring the highest paid) creating discord in the dressing room
- the lack of a leader on the pitch
- too much sugar in the tea
- too many players wanting out.
At the end of the day much of the above is down to management and leadership. I either want Mowbray out, or alternatively I want the Mowbray of old back again, sadly though he appears to have lost his passion.
MOWBRAY OF OLD
MOWBRAY PHOTOGRAPHED DURING THE WYCOMBE GAME
But what of our opposition on Saturday? Cardiff away has become a must win game as we plummet down the Championship faster than a Darwen girl drops her knickers (I can assure you from vast experience that is usually done with electrifying pace). Our fan base is so dissatisfied that instead of the 3,000+ subscribing to iFollow away games earlier this season we will be lucky to get 600, more much needed cash lost to our Club.
Cardiff are typical dollopers and they have a few hypocritical supporters following them as well, the sort of middle class of the Lady Nugee white van hating mode who remind me why the Labour Party are so out of touch.
1st up - NEIL ‘WELSH WINDBAGIO’ KINNOCK
Oh, the cheek of the man
2nd up: LORD KEN ‘LOADSAMONEY’ FOLLETT
Good friend of Tony and Cherie Blair and multi-millionaire author
Cardiff do have a former porn magnet in David Sullivan as fan. Sullivan was born in Penarth, he was a Cardiff fan before making his money selling vibrators in the local pubs and clubs - this projected him to better things like blue movies and a move to ‘Big City’ Birmingham. He could do with employing a personal shopper rather than picking up cast off clothes from from garage and car boot sales. In the picture below he is trying to do an impression of Lenin, perhaps he should have asked Jezza for some advice.
DAVID ‘DIRTY MACK’ SULLIVAN
JEREMY ‘RED’ CORBYN
Our very own ‘Blue’ Kate was so looking forward to this game. She would normally use this game for an opportunity to go for the ride of her life on the ‘Big One’ at Barry Island fun fair. Instead of going for a £5 session in the ‘Love Tunnel’ she instead chose to invite Rovers own hairy mammoth, Ben B, to her morning show. Unfortunately BB was so engrossed by the sight of Kate that he tried to encroach on her space in full view of the film cameras. Whilst Ben has been banned from tv he has landed a contract with David Sullivan for his new movie ‘Hairy Mammoth Lusty Wet Love’. It even pays better than Rovers....a new career beckons for BB me thinks.
KATE EXCITED AND LOOKING FORWARD TO THE BIG ONE
BEN B APPEARS AS TV GUEST OF OUR KATE
As for the game I had to do a lot of careful calming down of our superfan ‘Blue’ Kate. I thought she would be all of a tizz but no she wants me to get Ben B’s mobile number; she apparently likes hairy men. In between the big breaths she suggests a 3-0 win to Cardiff although she did suggest that Ben B will score very soon. Lucky bugger.
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